Sunday, September 30, 2007

The Weight of the World, Part Two

In one of my earliest posts, I wrote about spanking being a transformative experience, allowing me to regress into a little girl for a while, letting go of all my worries, and then regaining my womanhood and "the weight of the world." Well, the weight of the world became a little too heavy for a while, hence the hiatus. I disconnected from my body; I was all mind, all worries, all the time.

In my quest to free myself from troubles, my thoughts became preoccupied with punishment and how it could release me. Sex didn't just take a backseat, it got out of the car. I was surprised every time a kiss led to love-making and not a lashing. So I decided to take a break from writing about spanking, from, honestly, obsessing about it. Then it became a break from everything: reading, sleeping, focusing...

Something changed this weekend. Some piece of me returned. I was gone from myself long enough, I suppose. In celebration of my return to myself, I even changed my hair color back to its natural shade. I've spent so long escaping myself that I had forgotten how good it feels to just come home.

Fortunately for all of us, a favorite part of my home is the spankings my husband gives me. But whether I'm using them to escape a bad day or my grown-up self, I realized that to him, I am always a woman. His woman. And the spankings are to say I love you, I love this thing we do, I love that you love it, too.

My favorite fetish is still the punishment of the schoolgirl by the headmaster. My fantasies will probably always return to that. But I'm going to try something new. The next time I'm bottom-up for one of my beloved beatings, I'm going to try to take it like a woman. A strong, tender, intelligent, bruising, brave, bright-red bottomed woman.


  1. That's a great idea. You, as an adult woman, deserve a spanking from your man every bit as much as your inner child does from her teacher. Enjoy them both!

  2. It's good to have a break, but it's also good to finally be home. I get that.

    And I agree with Dave, it's a lovely post.

  3. Is that you in the picture, Abby?

    How in the world do you do that without getting a charlie horse?

  4. I love that Abby - that realisation that in spite of your own concerns you recognise that your husband loves you for you. I'm sure he appreciates spanking you when you are a big girl as well as when you are a little girl. Either way, you're his Abby, right?

    Rob aka anonymous - sorry, will organise blogger account some day

  5. Hi Abby, Dave here from the cherry red report. Hope all is well with you :-)

    Hope to see some more of your great blogger posts soon.


  6. Rob--Yes I am! I told my husband about your comment. I said to him, "You know how when you love somebody you want to tell the world? Well, I have!" Your comment just keeps making me smile.

    Dave--And Cheers to you, but not the Boston tourist-trappy kind. I hope to see more of my blogger posts soon, too! (Kicking self repeatedly, to limited avail.)


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