The Little Red Schoolhouse, now brought to you from anywhere and everywhere

from the webcomic Penny Arcade

Maybe I could have found a better illustration for the word LAPTOP, considering Strawberry Shortcake is riding Plum Pudding's back, but the picture captures the spirit of my writing, that is, turning the stories of our childhood into dirty spanking tales, which I can now do from ANYWHERE with the laptop Mr. W gave me this week!

The illustration, meant to mock video game designer American McGee's tendency to take a fairy tale character, make her slutty, and put her into a dark scenario, should get me down a bit, since that's what I do, too, only in spanking scenarios. But for everyone who mocks them, there's someone who loves his games, or at least love's American McGee's Alice, which, along with Zoo Tycoon 2, is still one of my favorite PC games, even if I haven't played a PC game in years. I hope that's the same for my stories. For every person who thinks, "Ewww, another fairy tale ruined," maybe there's someone who reads a bit of my writing and has naughty dreams about it later.

The good news is, there should now be much more of my writing, naughty dreams, and random dirty thoughts appearing here. I know, I know, I've said it before, but the laptop will make all the difference. For example, I am currently half-dressed, hair still dripping wet from the shower, sitting on the couch with the puppy while I write this instead of getting ready for work, which I really, really ought to be doing. Before, I would have had to go into the computer room, which I think may be cursed, and sit at the desk, which is at an unfixably wrong height. The couch is much better, even though I keep accidentally hitting buttons that are changing the text size on the screen. I'll figure it out. Point being, I can write from anywhere!

And I can keep defiling the stories of my youth! Hurray!