Saturday, July 28, 2007

What Happens in the File Room...

An unusual thing happened at work the other day. An older co-worker discovered that I had filed something incorrectly. She called out to me from the file room, "Abby, come in here." I'm not used to being addressed that way in real life, and I became confused. Have I fallen asleep while daydreaming? I don't normally think about being spanked by a woman. What's going on? Is she actually going to...?

I walked over to the file room with my head down, deciding, just for fun, to play with this random situation. "Yes, Miss S--?" I asked. I never use "Miss" when speaking to her, mind you. "Abby, look what I found in the L file," she said sternly. It was a J file. She had a bit of a grin in the corner of her pressed lips. What was going on? "I'm sorry, Miss S--." Then she said it. I can't believe it, but she did. "I'm going to have to punish you."

No! Seriously? Is this happening? Does this sort of thing really happen? I'm going to be spanked in the file room by my co-worker? Not even by my boss? Should I ask if I can call my husband to come watch? Should I say no?

"Um, okay?" I said instead. Really, I was terribly thrown by the whole thing.

"Put out your hand," she said then. Oh. But still. I don't think this is technically supposed to be happening. Or...oh no! Does she have a ruler, or, heaven forbid and a bit of a shiver, a tawse?

Again, I played along. "Yes, Miss S--." I held out my hand, palm down. She took it in her right hand, then slapped it, rather hard, with her left. "There, you've been punished," she said.

I nearly laughed. Oh no I haven't! I wanted to say. Instead I told her that I would try to pay more attention when filing. But now that I think about it, perhaps I will try harder to file incorrectly, just out of curiousity. Perhaps I'll bring in a little strap and hide it in the folder of the incorrectly filed file, just to see. In case these things really do happen in real life.

What I pictured happening, before I had to hold out my hand. (photo from


  1. You unlock this door with the key of imagination.

    Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of sound: “smack, whack, owww;”

    a dimension of sight: rounded, glowing bottoms, scissoring legs, flushed faces.

    You’re moving into a land of both tingling anticipation and smarting realization.

    You’ve just crossed over into…The Spanko Zone

  2. That is a great story -- you certainly need to jumble up all those files..and then report back to us on what transpires...



  3. When I worked at the Portland City Archive, they used to put the fear of God into me about mis-filing a document -- or rather, the fear of being fired and causing them legal distress over losing a document. But the fear of getting spanked would have been way funner. ;)

    Cool little vignette.


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